Merry Thanks -A-Ween

6 Oct

 

 

 

 

The holiday season is upon us whether we want to admit it or not. I’m already hearing sound bites not-so-discreetly placed in TV commercials,”Makes a great holiday gift” Let’s face the reality, drugs stores and most retailers have decided that its easier to lump all three holidays into to one, a new holiday has been born, Happy Thanks-A-Ween. All this starts to appear after BTS, (for those not familiar with retail jargon Back to School) The bag candy starts piling up the week school starts, from that point on (and after the sand pails and boogie boards have been cleared out on half price) the real onslaught occurs.

Next comes the Spiderman costumes and talking skulls. Those of you of a certain age will remember that adults did not participate directly in Halloween, other than answering to door after a few martinis or for the less fortunate accompany toddler,witches,princesses and cowboys around on their appointed rounds. The Day of the Dead has risen to second only to Christmas in retail sales, largely due to boomers who can’t give up portraying their alter egos as Vampire witches,celebrity princesses and porn star cowboys.

The perfect outfit for a children with aids benefit,everyday is Halloween

All the while if you look closely you will notice that the disposable turkey platters and Pilgrim party decor has taken a small space in the card aisle or a space that candy or costumes was unable to fill. Wander a few aisles away and you will see that cologne gift sets are making their seasonal debut, I despise gift sets,send a card with cash. The last thing I want is Old Spice soap on a rope.

The Swagger set..virility in a box

This is the Swagger Set Instant virility in a box……Swagger? Just what I always wanted,how about a little Swish to go along with it.

Enough on the subject of drug store merchandising. Fact is that Lynne and I have already done a few per-holiday,holiday decor…and have a date for Christmas garland bulb check at a local mall next week,a loathsome task requiring us to plug them in and replace burned out lines.

I’m burning too,with jealousy that the normal world is still enjoying their thoughts of summer while we’re steeped in the fast approaching holiday season,made even earlier by the fact that Hanukkah is early this year. Keep nurturing those tans and donning shorts,but take a moment to honor the less fortunate that live their lives a season ahead of you who are making bows and stringing lights, Merry Thanks-a-Ween to you and yours.

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